god, that's good!

i am ecstatic! i weighed myself this morning and yesterday morning, friday. both mornings, 97 lbs! i reached my goal weight for next friday, this friday (yesterday)! drastically reducing my calorie intake really boosted my weight loss quickly. the only thing i need to watch for now is not bingeing and gaining back the 3 lbs by this friday.. why is friday so important to me? it's my two year anniversary with my boyfriend <3 lucky it falls on a friday. it technically is our first one together, as i was away last year, so i really wanted to feel good about it, about myself. now if i can lose 1 lbs more in one week.. i've done it before, it's possible.. but that means i can't go right back to 1100 cals a day. my boyfriend got pretty upset when i was talking about lowering it.. he kept saying that we had 'settled on 1100 cals' a day, but i want it changed. i'll try this week for max 1000 cals.. 900 cals if i can manage. i'll just hide half my lunch in my second locker at school every day to cut 175 cals each day right there. then for dinner i'll just make sure to have smaller portions. breakfast though i think i should continue what i did during the detox.. black coffee or green tea and an apple. apparently apples are 60 cals but i have kind of smaller ones.. small round gala apples. i swear they have to be less than 60 cals, but i like to overestimate.
so first day off the detox.. i did go on a little binge last night, my last detox night. fuck. i had some smartfood (big weakness!), and some small danish cookies.. i had eight, which is insane, but for four cookies it was only 170 cals.. so 340 cals in total only. then smartfood, i maybe had a third of a bag.. but i did the math and it comes out to about 390 cals for that only! made me really happy, as i love smartfood so much. i love chips too, but comparing calories, smartfood wins. so even with that binge last night, i woke up and weighed myself this morning at once again 97 lbs. god that's good. this is really a big deal for me, because the last time i ever remember being weighed at 97 lbs or less was before high school, over three years ago. if i make it to even 96.5 lbs in the next month i will be overjoyed! so i decided on my own to eat max 1000 cals a day, 900 cals if i can manage. i'll tell my boyfriend if he asks how much i've eaten; i won't lie. i just need to do this.
today i'm going to his house again.. and his mum is making fettuccine alfredo, one of my favourites, with chicken but as i'm a vegetarian (really has helped me with weight loss!) i get some before she adds it.. last night i decided to have some before the alfredo sauce was put on too. she looked at me oddly when i told her, but i actually love just noodles and butter and parmesan.. less cals and fat than alfredo! she makes it  herself, with loads of cream and butter.. ugh. can't eat that first day off the detox, it'd blow my calorie intake right there! so i'm only having a small portion, with a teaspoon of butter and a shake of parmesan. if that, ahah. already today i've had like five little oatmeal muffins.. but they were homemade from scratch and really mini.. whole wheat flour and brown sugar too. i don't feel bad about them, i just feel content with my food intake and can wait until dinner to eat anything now, which is good. don't know how many calories were in the muffins as we made them smaller than the recipe said, and even then it didn't say. but i can assume it's enough til dinner for sure. also had a cup and a half of black coffee, and a green tea. i am going to have one or two smirnoff ices today i believe, and those have about 238 cals each. so i might just have one if i can manage, because my boyfriend's mum lets us drink, in moderation of course, and she knows i love those - she always gets some for us, and beer for him (i used to kind of like beer.. now, i really don't. but i would love to try molson 67, only 67 cals per beer! i'd drink that!) so it would be weird if i said no if she offered more than one. we'll see how that goes. but right there is 476 cals.. wow. there are smirnoff ice lights, 110 cals per bottle.. i need to get those next time! she's trying to lose weight too so maybe i could talk to her about it tonight.. she thinks i'm crazy for wanting to lose weight apparently but that's just because of the weight difference between her and i. she may need to lose way more than me, but i still need to lose minimum 5 lbs from here. so i'll see what she says about the light ones.. but i can do this! break the 97 lbs barrier for the first time in all of high school! i am so excited. i'll try and take pictures by next sunday latest to show exactly where i'm at and i'll continue maybe every sunday with my weekly food tracker from now on - i'll post my first sunday post tomorrow, minus the pictures, for an example. actually, i think there is an example in a previous post where i talk about an average daily food and calorie intake for my detox week.. called 'sunday morning' actually, and it'll be called the same every sunday. it'll be just like that, but there'll be five, one for every day of the week, then from now on, pictures too. so i have to get ready to head over to my boyfriend's, wish me luck!
but damn am i excited for this.