sick of me

i need to stick with my willpower. like i was really good wednesday! (yesterday), geez there was this pancake breakfast at my school and the smell was everywhere, and i was very close to it.. it was awful. sausages, pancakes, butter and syrup. i only had coffee, one with some splenda (0 cals though!) the other two nothing. i am a vegetarian, so that really helped with the sausage.. only been a herbivore for two months now, but i may go back to lean chicken breast only. i do eat fish as well, it's too healthy to give up, and the way i make salmon is amazing. we'll see about chicken breast though, because at least the protein's really filling.. only worried about the amount of cals in meat.. well if i wasn't a vegetarian, i think i may have fallen into temptation for the sausages. but i didn't! don't want to know how many cals are in those little things.. or what meat's in them even >< toooo many cals.. definitely would have blown my limit.
which made me curious to find out how many cals i burned daily.. with no exercise, just every day chores or tasks, school, etc. so i did some googling out of curiosity, and yay! i found a website that is near perfect - closest i'll find i'm sure. forget what the site was, but here's another helpful one: http://www.bmi-calculator.net/bmr-calculator/
but as for my results? well..
my 'resting (basal) metabolic rate': 979 cals
typical daily activities (that i entered): 510 cals
calories burned from running: 162 cals
for a total of: 1652 cals per day! changes: only tuesdays, thursdays, and sundays do i do the running to burn those 162 cals. mondays, wednesdays, and fridays, i do the elliptical to burn on average 520 cals. saturdays, i only burn about 300 cals on the elliptical - if i have the time. if i don't, i have other ways to burn about the same amount.
so it takes 3500 cals burned to lose 1 pound of fat.
erego, for this type of average week, i burn a total of: 26,809 cals.
and i weekly consume an average of:  8,500 cals. (for my average cal max, plus two days going to 1500.. it happens) =(
so by this logic:
it comes to a total of: 18,309 cals. takes 3500 burned to lose 1 pound of fat. therefore..
i should be able to lose 5 pounds if i stick to this, to the T, like perfectly, which is a longshot.. but if i can manage for one full seven day week, i'll post back if it made any difference, or if my body went into 'starvation mode', holding on to the ugly fat for survival. like i've been a few pounds lighter than this before. i will 'survive', body. give me a chance to show you.
like dinner was a bit much last night but i was at my boyfriend's -_- and his mum loves me and too often asks if i'm hungry or if "that's all i'm having." very small breakfast/lunch.. dinner was a roast so i had an excuse not to eat it (yay! they have meat a lot luckily) but there were potatoes, and she made gravy without roast drippings, justt for me.. fuck. she's so nice, but it would have been had she not done that. so i had a helping of whipped potatoes with gravy and butter. (my favourite!) then the rest of the celery that was my lunch. not thaat big i know but i still felt huge, even this morning waking up. i love morning stomach! like when i wake up and my stomach is flat as a board or, in the past, was concave even.. starved. i loved it. past two months or more though i've been waking up with regular stomach, slightly protruding. fat. it feels awful.
i want morning stomach again. i have to stick to my 1100 cals AND my exercise i listed.
if all goes according to plan, i might be finally satisfied with myself. maybe.