scattered

i absolutely love and adore everyone in this community.
i just needed to say that.. i really do. so this post is a little scattered, a bit of a lot of things.
so, it's the second day of june already.. wow. my doctor's appointment this coming tuesday (and i'll be a 'healthy' weight so no questions asked!), math summative, a test, and an exam, and of course the stanley cup playoffs! ahah i love hockey. really want a canadian team to win, so.. GO VANCOUVER! or at the very least a canadian to score the winning goal, if boston does win.. but the canucks have already won the first game of the series, last night, 1-0. 19 seconds left in third period. second time vancouver's gotten a game winning goal in the last minute. also my boyfriend's moving officially this weekend, and i have a funeral to go to this saturday (no worries, it's my mum's uncle/nanny's brother, who i've never met.. going to support my nanny <3) anyway june is pretty full!
today is also the day in fitness class where we do the beep test (ugh), shuttle run, situps, pushups, vertical jump, standing long jump, flexibility. and then bmi on this little thing you where have to hold with both hands directly on these silver parts. we do this whole thing at the beginning of the semester too, and then nearing the end so the teacher can see improvements, or lack thereof. i didn't exactly put it all my effort last time, so this time will show bigger improvements at least. i'm scared for my bmi calculations.
i told myself awhile ago i'd lose weight by my math exam, june 23rd, and i decided it's time to crack down on that. we have no snacks in the house anymore, nothing to tempt me with, and i've gotten so much better at not having after school snacks at my boyfriend's house with him.. i've been making him sandwiches (i know so stereotypical, but i love doing it), all with loads of meat of course, so i can never have a bite even. and if i make him sandwiches, he doesn't make nachos or a homemade pizza, where he insists on leaving some places with just cheese so i can have some. that was the biggest difference i noticed when i gained weight after february, my lowest weight.. i started to eat snacks after school with him, then dinner at home, and god forbid sometimes snacks after that. now that i'm cutting that out again, it's a good first step. i'm also writing down meal plans and calorie limites and all else multiple times to really get it in my head.. and i'm going to start recording my weight again like at the beginning of the year in october.. i still have the same black notebook, i brought it to school today and plan on using it as soon as i'm done with this post. i've got five tabs open as well with really low calorie meals, and i already know of some i have quite often (salmon and asparagus; perogies; large salad without dressing; half a frozen pizza; etc) and i plan on writing these down so when we go grocery shopping again i'll know what to suggest for dinners. i have til the 23rd of june, so i have 22 days to go now! i've done a lot of math regarding bmr and rmr and my exercise and whatever else, and calores i plan on taking in, and i should be able to lose at least 2 lbs. excited.
RULES:
- follow the same exercise plan i've alays done in fitness and when i'm off school, use my elliptical at home.
- no snacks after school!
- 3 litres of water a day (i've been really good at this one, a whole litre more than before)
- no eating past seven pm! (been bad at that.. but i've done it before, can do it again)
- only allowed coke zero after 2 litres of water (more incentive)
- stay under 100 cals til dinner (really good at that!)
BANNED:
- chips (of any sort)
- ice cream (of any sort)
- pizza (exception: half one of my frozen pizzas)
- chicken (exception: plain grilled/boiled chicken breast)
- cookies (of any sort)
- tim hortons (exception: black coffee/plain tea)
- 'extra' cheese (ex.: i can have cheese on my pizza, or alfredo sauce, but no extra parmesan on top)
- white bread (i barely eat bread at all, so it'll be easy)


example of my 100 cals before dinner, what i do every day really now:
breakfast: apple, small, 60 cals.
lunch: celery, a few stalks, approx. 10 cals; cucumber, a few slices, approx. 20 cals.
others: crystal light, 10 cals.
total: 100 cals. i love planning my own things. and i am overestimating, the cucumber's more like 10 cals, and both vegetabes are probably lower actually, i don't have that much of either. not even a quarter of a cucumber. so 100 cals maximum, most likely lower. awesome. i'm writing down what i eat again in that little black notebook (with calories of course), and weight whenever i can. looking forward to this, but won't be happy with weights or anything til the 23rd. man i feel so scattered, sorry! longer post than i meant xD


oh and that girl i wrote the notes to never nodded at me, never said a thing, and i have no idea if she even got the notes, or if she's been here, or if she knows who it is, or anything. i hate being clueless.