we r who we r

ke$ha makes sense. we are who we are, i am who i am. i wish people would stop trying to change that.
people keep trying to convince me to quit being vegetarian, because 'red meat is soo good' and you know why? because it has loads of fat. deiliciously fattening, unhealthy fat. now, my daddy supports it, and even brought salmon for me last night when my sister had dinner with him and my nanny (his mum), beacuse my nanny made homemade hamburgers (they were always amazing.. they smelled amazing too yesterday) so my daddy brought me salmon. he thinks it'll be beneficial for me, because of my other random health issues. well except my iron deficiency, it's kind of counterintuitive for that ahah oh well i take iron supplements it doesn't matter. but the whole dinner my sister was being playful, teasing me about how good they were.. she thinks i'm being ridiculous. she's never cared like i've cared about food, so i don't exepct her to understand, and i don't expect for me to ever even try to explain. people just hink i'm being stupid. like do they expect me to say something like 'well i'm terribly sorry for being a vegetarian, guys, really, i had no idea it was such an offence!' because that's not going to happen. then people think i'm stupid with counting calories (uhh, have they looked in the mirror lately? just counting them would make them much smarter about choices) and how i exercise regularly, like really? i can't even exercise more than twice a week or something without people being on my case? and then there's whatever the hell else i do that seems to bother people. i am being healthy. they just don't care about their bodies. as much as i care about mine.
so yesterday i won't even go into the details of my food. i will not. i've already confessed it to my boyfriend (who, stupidly, is happy that i ate worse than usual) and my sister, wel because she was with me the whole time, she saw it too and ate the same (except my salmon dinner was healthier) so i do not want to get into it yet again. i've already eaten my junk food for the day, the rest of the day will be under 800 cals now because well to be honest the angel food cake i had this morning (unusually good dunked in coffee i discovered) is probably more than 100 cals.. but i haven't been really sticking to 900 cals obviously, too many things in the way (families can be a huge burden sometimes, and boyfriends), so i figure 800 cals is reasonable for the day now, then 900 cals tomorrow seeing as i've joined a competition on another girl's blog, http://americaneaglelove-missionbeauty.blogspot.com/, so it'll really motivate me! i am the most competitive girl i know, as said in my last posted comment on her last blog post. so i can't wait to break my goddamn 97 lbs barrier. i know it's more like a plateau, except i kind of vary from 97 lbs to 99 lbs throughout weeks, so i'm never really stuck there, as much as it's just the lowest i've been and can't seem to get past it. so i'm off to go get changed for fitness, love spares right after fitness when we go to the gym! here's to burning 1100 cals again! and here's tp hopefully not feeling like i'll throw up from the exercise.. or maybe hopefully i do, hah.